For all you parents out there, a parents journey
Updated: Jan 9, 2022
"If I had my child to raise all over again, I’d build self-esteem first, and the house later. I’d finger-paint more, and point the finger less. I'd do less correcting and more connecting. I’d take my eyes off my watch, and WATCH with my eyes. I’d take more hikes and fly more kites. I’d stop playing serious, and seriously play. I would run through more fields and gaze at more stars. I’d do more hugging and less tugging" – Diane Loomans, Parent Positive Kids
It's an absolute privilege to be a parent. And although I've only ever been an 'official' parent to one child, my 16 year-old son Izaac, during my 16 years' work at Clyne, 62 & Red11 Models, I've had the honour and priviledge of being a second mum to hundreds of teens, and a crazy second aunty/disciplined big sister to hundreds more, learning lots about parenting along the way from my work with models:
Because being a model agent carries degrees of parenting. I now know this through experience, because I'm the mum of a teenager and worked with tonnes of teens. Being a model agent is incredibly unique, and something no other position could possibly offer.
I'm not their family, but I'm treated like family. I'm not their therapist, but I council them. I'm not their careers advisor, but I co-manage their career. I'm not their coach, but I coach them on the game of life. I'm not their mate, but I'm their confidante. I'm not their teacher. But it's my job to teach.
Now I don't need to tell you what it takes to parent a child/children, because a lot of us are living it, sometimes (or often) stumbling along trying to figure it out and making it up as we go along. We're making (and (over) correcting mistakes) as we try and continue unscathed and apparently unaffected, calling (and recalling) on people around us for a hand, lapping up everything we can by reading, watching and listening to people who can really teach us some $hit about this crazy game of life and the even crazier parenting game (because it's no longer just about us)...
We learn so much from each other.
NECKLACE CREDITS: 'Mother' necklace by COMPANY OF STRANGERS & interchangeable 'What's my Mood?' charm necklace co-designed by Amanda Betts & the woman who designed and made my one-off wedding necklace, ZORA BOYD-BELL.
So in this post, I'm simply sharing a little about the huge inspiration bringing Izaac into the world has meant not only for me (and all who love Izaac), but how being a parent to Izaac helped me SO MUCH with the models I've worked with. Likewise, life is give and take, so it's also about how being a second mum/model agent/mentor to the models I've worked with completely inspires me as I parent Izaac (and re-parent myself in the process - because Lord knows I needed to be re-parented!).
So I'm sharing a poem I wrote on the morning of Izaac's 16th birthday (it's my blog and I'll do what I want to!). Ironically, I noticed that the poem is, kind of, the repeat message IN LIFE FOR ALL OF US. Because the circles of life never stop, I've noticed. Enjoy.
A Parent’s Journey by Amanda Betts 6 November, 2013
When your dad and I decided We wanted you I remember Our wishes for you And when we discovered I was pregnant with you I remember Our excitement for you During your scans You'd swim and hide I remember Our anxiety for you As my clothes became All too small for me I remember The growing of you Your alien-like movements Oft' late in the night I remember The wonderment of you My belly shuddering From your tiny hiccups I remember Our laughter for you Rubbing your foot Pushed out from within I remember Our dreams for you Waking up early With broken waters from you I remember The fear of you My body writhing Labor deep in my core I remember Increasing pain of you Your Dad's fastest drive ever For me to give birth I remember Our anticipation of you The time you decided To enter this world I remember The intensity of you When you took your first breath Released your first cry I remember Our relief of you We were told the long lashes Belonged to a boy I remember Our pure joy for you I held your warm body Close to my breast I remember My reward for you You would not sleep Unless nestled in me I remember Being content with you Your tiny fingers Wrapped around mine I remember The perfection of you Taking you home On that beautiful day I remember Our happiness for you 16 years later The young man you've become I remember The child in you Everything you are And all you will be Never forget Our deep love for you.